Twilight Chatroom!
by Trouble.With.Words
Summary: Set after breaking dawn, the gang join a chatroom and..,it goes down hill from there.From betting to car crashs, they tell all to there computers, i had a laugh thinking of the chapters so read and enjoy! Might be suggestive but the rating should be ok! x
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys, this is my first twilight Fic, I wasn't sure about it but my friends thought it was good so I was like…what the heck! Read and enjoy

TWILIGHT CHATROOM=]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

User names:

**Bella=Newbie101**

**Edward=GoldenBoy**

**Alice=Secondsight**

**Jasper=Emotionallyaware**

**Emmett=Monkeyman**

**Rosalie=Vanityfair**

**Carlisle=McDreamy**

**Esme=MotherCare**

**Rennesme=HalfnHalf**

**Jacub=Alphamale**

**Chapter1:**

**Newbie101 has created chatroom.**

**Newbie101:'Anyone there"  
Goldenboy has entered chatroom.**

**Goldenboy:"I'm always here"**

**Monkeyman has entered chatroom.**

**Monkeyman:'GOD EDDie,your so predictable it's almost sappy"**

**Goldenboy:'SHUT UP,Emmett,jus because i have a meaningful relationship dosent mean i'm sappy and don't call me Eddie'**

**Monkeyman:'Looks like the only relationship your haven bro,and i thought the happy couple were goin so well but wen you get to that stage in your releationship,you can come 2 ur big bro 4 advice'**

**GOldenBoy:'SHUT UP EM"**

**Newbie101:"YEAH SHUT UP EMMETT"**

**MOnkeyman:HAHAHAHA**

**Emotionallyaware has entered chatroom.**

**Emotionallyaware:'Lay off Em'**

**Goldenboy:'Thanks Jas"**

**Emotionallyaware:"No prob,besides Em i hear different about last night"**

**Newbie101:"JASPER"**

**Golenboy:'JASPER'**

**Newbie101:"EDWARD"**

**Goldenboy:'What did i do?"**

**Monkeyman:"Dude its different wit chicks its not wat u do its da way dat u do it'**

**Emotionallyaware:'He's right dude"**

**Goldenboy:"suppose"**

**Newbie101:'EDWARD"**

**Goldenboy:What now?"**

**Monkeyman:"And Rose says der was nothing fun to do 2nite"**

**Newbie101:"Emmett do u mind,i want a private conversation with my husband"**

**Monkeyman:"Well, i hate to break it to ya bella but ur on the internet,nothin's private,if ya want a heart 2 heart,GET OFF"**

**Goldenboy:"Talk to my wife like that again,i swear...."**

**Monkeyman:"Wat,ur gonna throw ur piano at me,Mozart"**

**GOldenboy:'DATS IT"**

**GOldenboy has logged off.**

**MOnkeyman:'Bring it"**

**Monkeyman has logged off.**

**Newbie101:'Men'*sighs***

**Emotionallyaware:'I know"**

**Newbie101:'Whatever'**

**Newbie101 has logged off.**

**Emotionallyaware:"Women"*sighs***

**Mothercare has entered chatroom.**

**Mothercare:"hey jas,have u seen Edward and Emmett"**

**Emotionallyaware:"No,but i was talkin 2 dem here a minute ago i bet der--"**

**BANG**

**Mothercare:'WHAT WAS DAT"**

**EMotionallyaware:"*laughs*TO be honest mom it sorta sounds like a piano breakin"**

**MOthercare:'EDWARD,EMMETT,IF I WALK INTO THAT SITTING ROOM AND ANYTHINGS BROKEN I SWEAR—"**

**BANG.**

**Mothercare has logged off.**

**Emotionallyaware:*laughs*Well,cant say nothing happens around here,i guess,better log off and find Alice"**

**Emotionalyaware has logged off.**

**Hi, What you think? Well, let me know, I don't mind if you tell me its bad but if you like it I have 5 more stories, ready and waiting, all I need is your approval… and your reviews, so review people! xoxo**


	2. Grounded

Hiya, everybody, thanks for reviewing (or reading) this Fanfic, so here's chapter 2, enjoy! Thanks to SpicyStar1102 for being my first reviewer and thanks for what you said, Plus, to one of my best Friend's Rachy, I'm going to officially dedicate this Fanfic to you because you like read all the chapters already and have been so supportive, so thank you and Iove you , man Lol, enjoy the chapter… xoxo

Chapter 2:Grounded

User names=

Bella:Newbie101

Edward:Goldenboy

Rennesme:Halfnhalf

Jacub:Alphamale

Chapter 2:

Alphamale has created chatroom.

Alphamale:'Hey Nessie"

Halfnhalf has entered chatroom.

Halfnhalf:'Hey Jake"

Alphamale:'Hey Nessie, do u want 2 go out 2nite?"

Halfnhalf:'Yeah Jake,dat wud b cool but—"

Newbie101 has entered chatroom.

Newbie101:'Dont even think about it Rennesme,your grounded"

Halfnhalf:'But Mom, i said i was sorry"

Newbie101:'It dosent matter,you cant do that to people and Jacub Black,don't get me started—"

Alphamale:'Wat did i do?'

Newbie101:'You shud no better,your older and—"

Alphamale:'You sound like my mom and technically i'm still sixteen and i thought it was very funny—'

Newbie101:'Dont technically me Jake and it is not funny bringin you in for pet day"

Alphamale:*laughs*'There faces were priceless"

Newbie101:'JACUB!"

Goldenboy has entered chatroom.

Goldenboy:'Bella,sweetie calm down-'

Newbie101:'CALM DOWN,CALM DOWN"

Goldenboy:'I think Jacub's right,maybe Nessie can get some fresh air and clear her head,ok,so don't freak out,i no wat u think,that she—"

Newbie101:'YOU NO WAT I THINK,WELL YA KEPT THAT HIDDEN,DIDNT YA!"

Goldenboy:'Bella sweetie, calm down,okay, tell me wats wrong"

Newbie101:'I'm your wife,your suppose to be on my side"

Goldenboy:'Bella, I don't pick sides and Jacub can babysit Nessie for awhile"

Newbie101:*huffs*"Fine"

Newbie101 has logged off.

Alphamale:'Thanks Edward"

Halfnhalf:'I don't need babysitting but tanks Dad"

Goldenboy:'No prob, jus don't tell Bella"

Goldenboy has logged off.

Alphamale:'Pick you up at 8, okay"

Halfnhalf:"Sure=]"

Alphamale has logged off.

Halfnhalf has logged off.

A/N: So what you think, I really wanted to a Rennie/Jake chapter because you don't really see a lot of them in the book, and there so cute, plus, we don't really see Bella be a real Mom. Anyway if you have any Questions or anything let me know in your review or send me a PM, okay? Or if you just want to review, I love you even more xoxo


	3. Car Crash

Two chapters in one day, not to bad! But I really wanted to put this chapter up because its one on my favourites, hope you like it…

Chapter 3: Car Crash

User Names=

Bella: Newbie101

Edward:Goldenboy

Emmett:Monkeyman

Rosalie:Vanityfair

Jasper:Emotionallyaware

Alice:Secondsight

Esme:Mothercare

Carlisle:McDreamy

Rennesme:HalfnHalf

Jacub:Alpha male

Chapter 3:

Goldenboy has created chatroom.

Goldenboy:'Hey,guys you there?"

Monkeyman has entered chatroom.

Emotionallyaware has entered chatroom.

Emotionallyaware:"Hey Edward whats up?"

Monkeyman:''Yeah Eddie,wats up?"

Goldenboy:"Nothing much really,i jus figured since the girls have gone shopping,maybe we could do something'

Monkeyman:"Like something that the girls wouldn't let us do if they were here"

Goldenboy:*smirks*"Maybe''

Emotionallyaware:*smirks*'What do you suggest?"

Monkeyman:*smirks*'What would you say to a little race?'

Emotionallyaware:'Oh come on,Edward will win everytime!"

Goldenboy:'Ah Jaz,i'm touched,i feel all fuzzy inside''*smiles*

Emotionallyaware:'Shut up Eddie"

Goldenboy:*steam coming out of ears*'WILL YOU STOP CALLING ME EDDIE,FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!'

Monkeyman:'HELLO!Are we done arguing ladies,getting back to 2nite,i ment car racing,are we in'*smirks*

Emotionallyaware:"So in"*smiles*

Emotionallyaware has logged off.

Goldenboy:*shrugs*'Sure,whatever"*smirks*"I'm going to win anyway"

Goldenboy has logged off.

MOnkeyman:*Laughs*"There so goin down"

Monkeyman has logged off.

****************************

3 hours later..............

Newbie101 has created chatroom.

Newbie101:*sighs heavily*"Never again Alice,that was physically and mentally painful"

Secondsight has entered chatroom.

Secondsight:"Honestly shoppin isn't that bad bella,and honestly i cant let you out of this house as my sister in half the stuff you own,your lucky your really pretty"

Vanityfair has entered chatroom.

Vanityfair:'Hey,where's Carlisle?"

Secondsight:"He decided to take Esme to dinner,they deserve to get out more'  
Newbie101:'Why you lookin for Carlisle?"

Vanityfair:'Just looking for Tanya's number,i need to get my sweater from her"

Secondsight:'Oh"

Newbie101:'Is it just me or is it really quiet?"

Secondsight:'Too quiet"

Vanityfair:"The guys aren't here I wonder where they—"

Ring Ring, Ring Ring.

Newbie101:"Rose,your phone"

Vanityfair has logged off.

'Hello,yeah its Rose,Hi Carlisle,Have you seen-"

...

'What do you mean theres been a car accident-'

....

'How bad"

......

"A 3 CAR PILE UP"

....

"Oh,thank god'

....

'K,See ya soon,bye"

Vanityfair has logged back on.

Newbie101:'Rose,What happened?'

Vanityfair:*huffs*'Basically,our idiotic husbands have got themselves in a 3 car pile up"

Newbie101:'Oh my god,is Edward ok?"

Vanityfair:*snorts*'Yeah,he'll be fine...once he stops laughing"

Newbie101:'Laughing?"

Vanityfair:' Apparently, they find the whole thing hysterically funny and as soon as they got out of there cars, they fell to the ground and rolled around laughing there heads off, idiots"

Secondsight:"They could have been seriously injured,i really hope there not going into shock-'

Vanity Fair:'SHOCK,Ha,that'll be the day...if anyone saw them, we'll have to move again ,i swear i'm gonna kill Emmett and my stupid brothers..."

Newbie101:"Where's Carlisle?"

Vanityfair:"He's rounding the idiots up,when there fit to stand on 2 legs"*Mutters angrily*"Rehabs"

Secondsight:'Lightin up Rose,i'm sure they didn't mean to crash and the most important think is that there not hurt—"

Vanityfair:*Smiling menacingly*Trust me Alice,thats the least of there worries when they get home i swear i'm goin to......Did you hear that?"

Secondsight:"It sorta sounds like a....car"*gulps*

Vanityfair has logged off.

Newbie101:"Rose,wait....you cant kill my husband yet its not even been a year...-'

Newbie101 has logged off.

Secondsight:'Well,i guess someone has to protect my husband,since Edward has Bella,and Emmett..well...Emmett's a goner,either way,well better go coz Rose is gonna-"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Secondsight:'Is that.............laughing?"

"ARE YOU LAUGHING!"

Secondsight:'Well there goes Rose,better go before the show begins*Chuckles*This will be interesting"

Secondsight has logged off.

TO BE COUNTIUED......................................=]

A/N: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, a cliff-hanger, sorry but I just couldn't resist. Might be hard to up load more for a while, so bear with me and I'll do my best. Again, if you have any questions let me know and I'll answer as best I can. R+R, because they make me happy xoxo P.s if you want to guess how the next part goes, be my guess but I bet no one will guess right, for anyone who does, I'll put you in a up coming chapter. A little competition, didn't kill anyone, so take a guess xoxo


	4. Car Crash Pt 2

Hiya and thanks to every one who review or read, thanks so much it means a lot but anyway here's the continuation to car crash...enjoy!!

Chapter 3-Car Crash:Pt 2

User names=

Bella:Newbie101

Edward:Goldenboy

Emmett:Monkeyman

Jasper:Emotionallyaware

Alice:Secondsight

Rosalie:Vanityfair

Chapter 3, Pt 2:

The night after.......

Goldenboy has created chatroom.

Emotionallyaware has entered chatroom.

Monkeyman has entered chatroom.

Goldenboy:'So...."

Emotionallyaware:'So......"

Monkeyman:'Yeah,so............"

Goldenboy:'How's the bruises?"

Monkeyman:'Okay,i guess,there gone yellow/purplely colour"

Emotionallyaware:'Good,Good,eh..,about last night—"

Monkeyman:'Yeah,nothing like my faithful brothers hiding behind their wives,theres real loyalty,right there"

Goldenboy:'That's really melodramatic Em,come on,would you have stayed for us"

Monkeyman:'.........THAT'S NOT THE POINT!"

Emotionallyaware:'Guys, lets take a chill pill,okay—"

Goldenboy:'STAY OUT OF THIS JAZ"

Monkeyman:'STAY OUT OF THIS JAZ"

Emotionallyaware:'HEY,lay off okay,jus coz you have problems with your wives"

Goldenboy:'I love my wife"

Monkeyman:'Yeah*Sarcasm*How luckly was she"

Goldenboy:'Just coz you married the blonde version of Satan"

Monkeyman:'WHAT DID U SAY BOUT MY WIFE!?"

Goldenboy:"YOU HEARD!"

Monkeyman:'OKAY,REMATCH,MOZART,IHOPE YOU KNOW THE DEATH MARCH!"

Emotionallyaware:'Come on guys,cant we talk about this—"

Monkeyman:'SHUT UP JAZ,either stay here or be referee"

Emotionallyaware:FINE,FINE,but if the girls ask,not my idea,okay here are the rules=

1.NO killing(I'm serious!)

And...that's it really,okay are we ready—"

Newbie101 has entered chatroom.

Newbie101:'Where you goin?"

Goldenboy:'Out"

Emotonallyaware:'Out"

Monkeyman:'Out"

Newbie101:"Yeah but where?"

Goldenboy has logged off.

Emotionallyaware has logged off.

Monkeyman has logged off.

Newbie101:'..........Well nothing to do now except say "GO TEAM EDWARD"

Vanityfair has entered chatroom.

Vanityfair:*smirks*'GO TEAM EMMETT"

Secondsight has entered chatroom.

Secondsight:*smiles*"Place your bets ladies"

Vanityfair:*smiles evily*'Slave for a week"

Newbie101:'..........Deal,"*smiles*'I trust my husband"

Secondsight:'Okay,but you do realise,if they draw,your both mine*laughs*

Newbie101:'He better win...."

Vanityfair:'......If he knows whats good for him"

Secondsight:'All's fair in love and war....and bets"*smiles*

***************************************

3 hours later......

Goldenboy has created chatroom.

Monkeyman has entered chatroom.

Newbie101 has entered chatroom.

Vanityfair has entered chatroom.

Secondsight has entered chatroom.

Goldenboy:'Hey"

Newbie101:'Who won?"

Monkeyman:'Well,what can i say, brotherly love and all,we truced"

Vanityfair:'WHAT!"

Newbie101:"WHAT!"

Secondsight:*Laughs*"GO TEAM ALICE!!!!!!!!"

A/N: hiya what do you think? Be brutally honest, or be overly sweet, i dont mind:D but anyway my friend pointed out to me a few days ago that alice see's the future so its cheating but what if she did what to cheat, just a after thought. Anyway review, leave comments, suggestions and anything else you leave in a review that i'm just to tired to remeberXD xoxo


	5. Home Crasher

Hiya x,Since I love this story and the people who follow it:D, i updated 2 in one day for both my twilight stories(yeah me!) anyway enjoy....

Chapter 4: Home crasher

User names:

Bella=Newbie101

Edward=Goldenboy

Emmett=Monkeyman

Rosalie:Vanityfair

Alice:Secondsight

Jasper:Emotionallyaware

Carlisle:McDreamy

Esme:Mothercare

Rennesme:Halfnhalf

Jacub:Alphamale

Chapter 4:

_Bella ,Edward , Emmett and Jasper are talking about renovating Bella's cottage._

Monkeyman:"I still think it would be cool"

Newbie101:'I'm not putting in a hot tub, so you might as well give up now"

Monkeyman:'I swear you and Edward are so serious, live a little"

Goldenboy:'Were dead"

Monkeyman:*huffs impatiently*"not the point, Eddie!"

Emotionallyaware:'He's right though"

Monkeyman:'Jas, you're not helpin"

Newbie101:'How about this Emmett*smirks*When you get your own house, i'll buy you one"

Monkeyman:'Whats that suppose to mean?!"

Goldenboy:'I'm sure Bella was just pointing out the fact,that you still live with you parents,isn't that right sweetie"

Newbie101:"Couldnt have putt it better myself"*smiles*

Monkeyman:'SCREW YOU MAN...and besides you lived with Carlisle longer,so there!Filthy hypocrite"

Goldenboy:*smirks*'I was on my own at the time brother,so it dosent count"

Emotionallyaware:'Hey,guys don't gang up on Em"

Newbie101:"Jas do ya really want to go there?"

Emotionallyaware:'Good point,your on your own Em"

Emotionallyaware has logged off.

Monkeyman:*mutters angrily *"Traitor"

Newbie101:*laughs*"Come on lets go watch TV"

Newbie101 has logged off.

Monkeyman:'FINE!......I call couch"

Monkeyman has logged off.

Goldenboy:*sighs heavily*"I really worry about that one"

Goldenboy has logged off.

****************************************

2am that day.......

Bang,Bang...Bang,Bang....Bang,Bang...

"Was that the front door"said Bella wearily.

"Yeah,sounds like it but who would come at this time in the morning"said Jasper looking into the hallway.

"Oh God...."groaned Edward,as he got up off the couch and made his way to the front door.

"Edward what is it?"Said Bella getting up to but Edward stopped her with his hand on her shoulder.

"No Bella,stay here....its best if i do this alone"He made his way to the door but before he even took a step Bella took his arm "Edward is it that bad..."

Edward suddenly burst out laughing but the startled and shocked look Bella gave him stopped him,so he was reduced to biting his lip,to smother the laughter.

'Sorry Bella its just i kinda wish it was something dangerous or bad,now i got ot go before they burst the door down"and with that Edward opened the door and closed it abruptly,both making a quick exit and blocking Bella's view of the visitor.

For a moment they stood there,in silence before Emmett burst out"Window"and they all ran pushing each other out of the way to get a better view. What there saw was the most funniest and shocking sight they all saw.

Mike Newton stood clinging to Edward with a volka bottle in his hand and the other around Edward,as they looked closely Mike was crying,although it was more of a ball,and Edward stood there looking both mortified and shocked at the same time but he just stood there and patted Mikes back awkwardly,then Mike passed out,leaving Edward holding him up,the look on Edward's face made them all burst out laughing,but then suddenly Edward turned to look at them.

As soon as this happened,they all dived for the floor,unfortunately it ended up as a rugby pile up,with all off them stacked on top of each other. Then the front door opened and Edward walked in with Mike over his shouldered and stared at the huddle on the floor,and the huddle raised there heads and looked up at him,and they just stared,unable to move and there was silence,until the pile fell down leaving them all on the floor.

Edward was the first to speak 'Carlisle, Esme mind Mike please, everyone else on the computer, if I have to tell you this story face the face, I'll.....I'll just be on the computer, ok!"And with that he climbed the stairs, leaving the whole house silent again, until they about killed each other for laptops, computers, phones and other internet accessible devices.

Goldenboy has created chatroom.

Newbie101:'What happened Edward?"

Goldenboy: 'Well it's like this....."

TO BE CONTINUED....................

A/N: Hehe:-p, i love this story line, i want'd to do it for ages and here it is. I hope you guys like it too, so let me know what you think. REVIEW...please;) xoxo


	6. Home Crasher Pt 2

hey guys, thanks for anyone who's read these's stories, here's one of my more really weird but hopefully good chapters, let me know what you think........xoxo

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Chapter 4-Home Crasher:Pt 2

User names:

Bella:Newbie101

Edward:Goldenboy

Emmett:Monkeyman

Jasper:Emotionallyaware

Rennesme:Halfnhalf

Chapter 4-Pt 2:

Last time on Home Crasher.....

Monkeyman:'Well man,wat happened?'

Goldenboy:*Blushes*"Well its kind of embarrassing.."

Monkeyman:'Suck it up man,wat happened?"

Goldenboy:'I don't no where to start.....'

Monkeyman:'Well the beginnings a good place to start"

Newbie101:Shut up Em,start from when you went outside"

Goldenboy:'Well,it was kind of......awkward"

Newbie101:'It was awkward for you,i saw you holding another man,i thought you left something out in your vows"

Emotionallyaware:*smirks*"Good point Bella"

Goldenboy:"Come on,you cant be serious!"

Monkeyman:'There's no shame in a little bit of both Eddie, no need to feel ashamed....*laughs*"

Goldenboy:'Shut up guys"

Monkeyman:*still laughing*"No seriously,wat happened?"

Goldenboy:'Ok,fine, Well...when i went outside,isaw Mike,staggering with a volka bottle in his hand,he staggered over and said...well more like slurred "Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Edward,buddy...wat u doin here man"I said

"Mike,i live here,your drunk,let me drive you home-".He staggered closer and put a hand on my shoulder and said

"Right,Right,here i forgive u man Bella was my home girl,but i guess she loves you more,i wont hold no grudges man-"and then he started ballin cryin and what could i do,i just patted his back and he continued,through sobs

"Man.....I'm sorry....I love you man....your like a brother man....tell the baby i said Hey-"and he sorta collapsed and i carried him back here".

Halfnhalf:*snorts*'Baby,how insulting,i bet i have more intelligence in one finger than he has in his whole body"

Newbie101:'Be nice Rennesme,Wow i wasn't expecting that"

Goldenboy:'No,you thought i was gay,much better"

Newbie101:'I was kidding and besides i trust you and Mikes a lunatic,so it all cleared up"

Emotionallyaware:'Well,all sexuality aside, we still have a unconscious human downstairs in a houseful of vampires"

Newbie101:'True"

Monkeyman:"I say we dump him on his front yard"

Halfnhalf:"I agree with uncle Emmett"

Monkeyman:'I love that kid"

Newbie101:"Okay,i call shot gun"

Newbie101 has logged off.

Monkeyman:'Me and Jaz will grab the body"

Monkeyman has logged off.

Emotionallyaware:"Sure"

Emotionallyaware has logged off.

Goldenboy:'I'll drive,Hey Nessie wanna come for a ride?"

Halfnhalf:'Sure Dad=]"

Goldenboy has logged off.

Halfnhalf has logged off.

a/n: Hey hope it was a good ending, it got into my head , r&r, coz it makes me happy :] xoxo


	7. Volturi for dinner

Hey guys thanks for the reviews, they were so nice*sniffle*, I'm glad you guys like it, and like i was flowing with tears(but also because i just finished the book Slumdog Millionaire, and my friend bought me the soundtrack, so i started listening to the sad songs and i was happily sad, like when you finish the a movie and it's a happy ending, but your reviews like sent me over the edge:]) So for anybody who is reading this story by a over-emotional inspiring writer, here's my new Chappie...enjoy:] xoxo

Chapter 5: Volturi out for dinner

User names=

Bella=Newbie101

Edward=Goldenboy

Emmett=Monkeyman

Carlisle=McDreamy

Chapter 5:

Goldenboy has created chatroom.

Monkeyman has entered chatroom.

Newbie101 has entered chatroom.

McDreamy has entered chatroom.

Goldenboy: "Cool name Carlisle"*smiles*

McDreamy:*Shrugs*"What can i say, Esme's got me watching Greys Anatomy"

Newbie101:"Oh My God, i feel so sorry for Meritidh and Derek, and George's exam—"

Monkeyman:"Leave the poor man alone Bella, its bad enough he has to watch it with her, now you want to gossip about it, god, that's just cruel"

Goldenboy: "Yeah coz your wife's so much better"

Monkeyman:*smiles*"Your just jealous coz i got me a real woman, man, i feel your pain bro"

Goldenboy:"Yeah coz we all dream of waking up to Barbie gone physco, not only that*smirks*"Physco Barbie Halloween version, fangs included"

Monkeyman:*Signs*"I love my wife you, she's perfect"

Goldenboy:*laughs*"Well, i guess that makes one of us"

Monkeyman:*shrugs* "I just don't have the energy, man, I'd tell you why but *smirks* A gentleman never kiss'n'tell's".

Newbie101: "God Emmett your such a guy, you're perfect for each other!"

Goldenboy: "She's right you know, you too are made for each...i mean, where would Barbie be without her Ken?"

Monkeyman: "What's that suppose to mean?!?"

Goldenboy: *smirks* "No seriously, you're like a ken doll, strong looking with dark hair and more importantly, *smirks* a hollow head".

Monkeyman: "Tats it , your going down, so hard, you won't even realise-"

Newbie101: "Boys! Honestly does everything have to end in a fight-"

Goldenboy: *laughs* "Yeah, I'm sure that hollow head of yours could do a lot of damage-"

Newbie101: "Honestly, you're so immature!"

Newbie101 has logged off.

Monkeyman: "God, what's her problem?"

Goldenboy: "Eh-"

DING DONG!

Monkeyman: "DOOR!"

Goldenboy: "Em...you do realise they can't hear you, you're on the computer!"

Monkeyman: "Oh, yeah......., right!"

Monkeyman has logged off.

Goldenboy: "What is he-"

"DOOR!"

Goldenboy: *sighs heavily* "Must I have the looks and brains of the family"

Monkeyman has logged back on.

Goldenboy: "So who's at the door?"

Monkeyman: "Don't know-"

"EDWARD!"

"YEAH, BELLA"

"COULD YOU COME DOWN HERE FOR A SEC?!"

"....SURE"

Goldenboy has logged off.

Monkeyman: *sighs* "She say's jump, he says would you like fry's with that, don't know how he could let his wife walk all over him-"

"Emmett!"

"Yeah, Rose?"

"Come down for a sec, will you?"

"Yeah, jus give me a sec-"

"NOW!"

Monkeyman: "I'm such a hypocrite"

Monkeyman has logged off.

_Back to Edward...._

"What's wrong Bella?"

"There's someone here to see you...us"

"Who?..."

"Ah, Edward, Bella, you know I told you everything would work out!"

".....Aro!?!?!....what are you doing here?"

"Well I was in the neighbourhood, you know"

"Know I dont know"

"Well....anyway, how are you, not bad I hope... oh your daughters here and her...dog, how do you do little one"

"Bite me!"

"Rennesme!"

"She's right"

"Jake..."

"I can see we got off on the wrong foot-"

"No Duh!"

"Rennesme-"

Esme walks into the room, with her overly warm, motherly presence. Joined by her husband.

"So who's up for a little hunting trip?"

"What a lovely idea, why don't we all go together" Says Aro, clapping his hands together.

"Whoopee" Says Rennesme, sarcastically, of course.

"Now Nessie....what a lovely idea Aro, come on guys"

To be continued.....

A/N: Hey, I just about have the 2nd part of this ready but it needs the finishing touches and it should be up and running, or falling depending on what you think, let me know guys it's the only way i can get better, plus i like reviews, guilty pleasure:] R&R guys xoxo


	8. Volturi for dinner Pt 2

hey people,because I'm sooooooooo nice i'll add this straight away but dont forget to review and i'm so lucky thet reviews so far are so nice and constructive, what more can a girl ask for? anyway, before i go on, here's the continuation for volturi for dinner...hope you like it :] xoxo

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Chapter 5: Volturi for dinner Pt 2

_Edward, Bella, Jasper, Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, Esme, Carlisle, Jacub, Rennesme and Aro are out hunting animals (much to Aro's detest) in the woods._

Jacub finds himself walking with Aro on one side of him and Rennesme on the other.

"So Jacub, is it? I hear you've imprinted on Rennesme, that's very interesting"

"Thanks, I guess"Jacub replies bitterly.

"Dose it worry you, going hunting with vampires?"Aro asks, ignoring the cold shoulder from Jacub.

"No—"

"Don't worry Aro; I don't think we'll ever get that desperate!"Smiled Edward, walking up behind them.

"Jeez, thanks guys, you know, for not eating me"smiles back Jacub, with a expression of mock sadness, pushing Edward.

"Also" chimes in Rennesme "How else would we take Jake for a walk"

"I not a dog" scowls Jacub.

"That's really a matter of opinion" smirks Edward, who gets a strong push off Jacub.

"BOYS!" calls Esme a few miles behind.

"SORRY!" shouts back Jacub and Edward, before name calling under there breath.

"Leech"

"Dog"

"Blood sucker"

"Flea bag"

"Cradle snatcher" they say at the same time, before scowling at each other and then bursting into fits of laughter.

"I heard that" said Bella and Rennesme smiling.

"Sorry" said Jacub and Edward smiling back.

"You should be!" said Emmett giving both Edward and Jacub a push "You dirty old men" he said smirking. Since Edward and Jacub were both on the ground, Emmett looked over to Jasper, smiling and Emmett ran over to Edward and Jacub and shouted "PILE UP!" The only thing Edward and Jacub could say was "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" and "uhh!" when they landed on them. Ay this stage Emmett, Jasper, Edward and Jacub were both on the ground fighting. Each had an unfair advantage. Edward being able to think what the other person was going to do. Emmett being unbelievable strong and punching anything in arms length. Jasper making them all fluffy and dazed, before punching them. Finally Jacub being.........well, Jacub just smelled so bad that the others tried not to go near him.

"Now, Boys" said Carlisle smiling "Can't bring you anywhere" he was coming over to the fight, bringing Esme with him. Everyone else just circled the fight, gossiping, talking, placing bets the usual. "Should we break up the fight" said Aro worriedly.

"No Aro, I've got twenty bucks on Edward" said Bella, fanning herself with a handful of fives.

"Yeah, I've got twenty on Emmett" said Rosalie, leaning on a nearby tree, watching the fight from a safe distance.

"Yeah, come on Jasper, I've got twenty on you sweetie" chimed Alice sweetly but with a fierce determination.

"Come on Jacub, I've got all my pocket money on you" said Rennesme, beside Bella.

"Renny" says the girls.

"Hey, I'm standing by my man" says Rennesme, holding her head high.

"What about you Esme?" said Bella curiously.

"Now girls, you know a mother hasn't got favourites" said Esme matter of factly.

"You must have one that you like better, mom" said Jasper, in Emmett's headlock.

"Yeah, mom" the other boys chimed in.

"I was here first, mom!" said Edward dodging a punch from Jacub.

"I'm the quiet one mom, i don't annoy you, unlike some people" Said Jasper, staring pointedly at Emmett before kicking him in the side.

"I took Rose, for ten years, what more could you want" chocked out Emmett from the ground.

"I ate all the food you gave me" said Jacub in a cute voice.

"Yeah, before dumping it in a ditch somewhere" muttered Edward, loud enough for Jacub to hear it but to low to hurt Esme's feelings.

"Well I'm tired, let's call it a night, guys" said Carlisle before walking over and breaking up the fight.

"Well, i guess...i should be going" said Aro, checking his non-existing watch.

"Won't you stay for hunting" aid Esme in mock disappointment.

"I really should go, I'll see you all soon, ciao"

"CIAO" they all said waving. Aro backed away into the forest and disappeared.

"Well, he's gone" said Rennesme happily, hi fiving everyone.

"Yeah, Thank God" said Edward, patting his daughter on the head. "And just in time for Desperate Housewives, Nessie"

"O.M.G, I totally forgot, thanks Dad" Rennesme sprinted off, then stopped halfway and shouted "COME ON, JAKE". Jacub ran off obediently, leaving everyone else behind laughing.

a/n: Hey, People, what do you think?, I really like putting a bit of fighting, TV programmes and i love the way Jake is being bullied by a baby/toddler/league of her own, or whatever you would refer to Rennie(i don't really like calling her Nessie, but then again, it's not nice calling her after a type of medication, either!). but people I have to think of a new chappie becuase my creative thinking well is all dried up, so i wont be review till then but if anyone has a idea i'll be more than happy to run with it and give you credit, but if you cant dont sweat it, i'll think of something, So you know what to do, click the little review button, say whatever you want, and go along your merry(or not) lives. R&R people, with sugar on top! Xoxo


	9. AN

A/N: Hey guys haven't got a chapter ready yet but i just want to clear up a few things that are in the reviews, sorry but I'm one of those people who have to clear things up with people or answer a question as best I can, it's an annoying trait to have but one that i posses, sorry. Also, if any of the things I say come off mean, or something sorry, it's not meant that way promise. Anyway, I got loads of people saying about the spelling of the name Jacub, thank you for pointing it out but this is why it is. Now I'm not the best speller and when i have a idea i just write it out, i don't think of the spelling plus, my spell check is...rubbish!!!, so bear with me, okay?. Also, i wrote these chapters way before I even knew about Fanfiction, and I literally just found out the spelling was wrong, when i uploaded them all and being a sieve head, forgot to correct it, but from now on all the chapters are new and not written like, last year ago, so I'll spell it right in future for any Jacub people:] x

Also, now this bit really pi-doing my head in, (no offense, but i have a funny mind and i got to get this off my chest because it's really nagging me). Look, I know the story is called **Twilight Chatroom**, but seriously it's really hard to show the story from a computer's perspective, so YES I will have to venture off of it, if that's okay? Plus, i know there more human than vampire in the story but I thought they might loosen up a bit since there not under attack or whatever, plus, i know i mentioned something about them getting hurt or something(which i know can't be possible) but i just put it in there to fit in with the story.

And with the whole thing about them talking like there in front of each other and not on the computer, look it's just the way I wrote it so....get over it, it's the way I write it, It can't be helped, okay?.

Look, it's just one review really annoyed me, like if it's that bad, why'd you read it???, look sorry about that, I'm sure it was meant as helpful Critism or something and I'll try take it onboard all the same, it's just the way they said it, like well...they sounded full off it, to be honest, and I guess I can't please everyone, but most of the reviews have been positive so thanks guys, i like knowing that ya take a interest in the story:] x but you're entitled to your opinion, so keep it coming all the same and to people who actually like my story will be updated soon. C ya later people xoxo


	10. The Speech

A/N: Hey guys...I'm alive! Love that line lol, anyway thanks to Rachy I have a new Chapter for ya's, hope you guys (and gals) like it...

Disclaimer: I don't own a thing....it sucks being poor: D!

Chapter 7:

Newbie101: Bella

HalfnHalf: Rennesme

Goldenboy: Edward

VanityFair: Rosalie

HalfnHalf has entered chatroom.

HalfnHalf: "I finished it!"

Newbie101 has entered chatroom.

Newbie101: "Already?"

Goldenboy has entered chatroom.

Goldenboy: "Finished what?"

Newbie101: "Rennie's doing a speech for the reception after Kate and Garret's wedding"

Goldenboy: "Really"

HalfnHalf: "Yeah, do you want to hear it Daddy?"

Goldenboy: "...sure"

HalfnHalf: *cough, cough* "We are gathered here today-"

Newbie101: "Um sweetie...that's what they say_ during _the actually ceremony"

HalfnHalf: "...Uh..., anyway, I'll skip that part then...*cough*...I just want to say I'm so happy for Kate and Garret, there like the cutest and really it's all down to me, but it's ok, you're so welcome..."

Goldenboy: "...wait...what?"

Newbie101: "Yeah honey, what do you mean?"

HalfnHalf: Well, if they hadn't been fighting to keep me alive in the first place they wouldn't have met, hence, they wouldn't have fell in love, hence, they wouldn't have been getting married, hence-"

Goldenboy: "They wouldn't be asking you to write a speech"

Newbie101: "Hence, we wouldn't be on this chatroom"

HalfnHalf: "Exactly...now can I continue....Good, well, If you have kids can I be godmother"*smiles happily*

Goldenboy: "...eh"

Newbie101: "They can't have kids...there..."

Goldenboy: "Yeah...there vampires"

HalfnHalf: "But you and Mommy are vampires and you had me!"

Goldenboy: "...true...Bella, help me out here"

Newbie101: "Rennie...it just can't happen, sorry sweetie..."

HalfnHalf: *looks down sadly* "...Oh.....can they adopt?.."*sighs hopefully*

Goldenboy: "I don't see why not....."

HalfnHalf: *squeals excitedly* "Brilliant....it'll be very Madonna or Angelina Jolie though... and I suppose I'll be like Elton John..."*lost in thought* "God I can't wait till I have my own kids"*jumps up and down*

Newbie101: "...excuse me?!?"

HalfnHalf: "I mean when me and Jake will have Kids...You know, I hope i have a girl and a boy, rather than two boys or two girls. But if i had triplets, I hope its two boys and one girl, rather than all girls or all boys...."*rambles on*

Goldenboy:*Steam coming out of ears* "...triplets!?!"

Newbie101: ".....Edward...sweetie?"

Goldenboy: ".....I have to go...."

Newbie101: "Where are you going?....."

Goldenboy: "I have to see a man about a dog..."

Goldenboy has logged off.

Newbie101: "....that can't be good"*shakes head*

VanityFair has logged on.

VanityFair: "Hey Bella, What's wrong with Edward...he just took the front door off its hinges..."

Newbie101: "WHAT! Got to go"

Newbie101 has logged off.

HalfnHalf: "Aunt Rosalie?"

VanityFair: "Yes, darling?"

HalfnHalf: "You're getting married right?"

VanityFair: "Yes...."

HalfnHalf: "Could I speak at y_our _wedding..., pretty please, please, please, please!-"

VanityFair: "...eh"*laughs nervously* "....we'll see"

HalfnHalf:*huffs and folds arms indignantly* "It's a no, isn't it...!"

A/N: Hey...how was it? I'm little rusty, plus I didn't know which ending to do but I thought this was the best one. Strangely enough I have seen this scene in real life...not a good sigh, very funny though. R&R guys and if you have any idea's send them on...if not than please review so I know what you guys think anyway....See ya*wave* x

p.s I took a line from a Irish play called Lovers, I really liked it in English Class so I brought it in here, just so Brian Frial known's it's all his. X


	11. Over heard in Dublin

**Hey, god I'm so finally I'm finally updating like after forever. This was wrote in like 20 minutes in a free English class, so i hope it's as good as the others********. Wrote for Rachel, who's on holiday*sob*.**

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**Goldenboy: Edward**

**Newbie101: Bella**

**HalfnHalf: Rennesme**

**Disclaimer: Dont own a thing, except the idea**

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**Chapter 8: Overheard in Dublin**

Current location of America's favourite family is rainy, rural Ireland*Yeah, finally, my country gets some recognition* Fan girls please calm down, the Cullen's have come over to Ireland, well lets here what they have to say shall we.

Golden boy has created chatroom.

Newbie101 has entered chatroom.

Goldenboy: "Well....It's a good environment for us; I'll give it that...."

Newbie101: "Well yeah and it does feel very homier..."

HalfnHalf: "God, were moving aren't we? *deep, annoyed sigh* I just got so good at not drinking my classmates and now in this important part of my life, I'll be emotionally scarred with lack of stab...stability, do you want that for me? Do you!?"

Newbie101: "Edward what have you been teaching my daughter!?"*crosses arms*

Goldenboy: "I've only been giving her a hand with some words"

Newbie101: "She sounds like a dictionary...not a little girl!"

HalfnHalf: "Honestly mother, I'm not a child...I have the mental ability of someone three times my age!"

Newbie101: *Signs frustrated* Tell me all about it when you get pass 3ft ok!, Honestly Edward see what i mean...."

Goldenboy: "Ok fine, I'll lay off but god forbid *shivers* she'll pick up slang"

HalfnHalf: *laughs* don't worry pops, everything is as cul as ice, ya feel me *winks cheekily*

Goldenboy: "Oh brilliant! She sounds like Mike Newton *shakes head sadly*

HalfnHalf: "Is Mike that guy who was at the house a couple of nights ago-"

Newbie101: *pats head* No Rennie, let's not go there, well we might as well look around, let's ask for directions...here's someone, excuse me? Do you know a place where we can stay?

Dublin1: "Alrite bud, whats da stary, is it accommodation ur after...well go down da road n keepin turning till da sign, it shud b around der, is dat ok wit ya's buds...well i best be off, my missus will b thinking i'm drinking da dole, bye buds"

Edward:*Scratches head* "Did you get a word of that?"

HalfnHalf: *shrugs shoulders* "Maybe it's Irish"

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**A/N: Well i had to get the Irish thing in there, I'm half and half about this story but I'll wait to see what you guys think, so R&R, please and thanks x**


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